in my life

It's fairly late at night, but I've been meaning to write something, so here goes. Life has not been good lately, as some of my friends know.

My dad died two weeks ago. He was 84, and had had 3 heart attacks already. My parents have lived in Florida for many years, and we weren't that close. I only saw them once or twice a year, though we spoke on the phone regularly. When my mom called, I knew I had to get the next plane. And I did.

There followed several days of chaos and emotional maelstrom. My mother was calm for the first couple of hours while she made calls, then she went to pieces. They had been married 54 years.

I had to deal with a whole bunch of relatives I don't know or like very well for several days, often playing hostess because my mother couldn't. I don't share much with my biological family, not religion, values, politics or even tastes in clothing. My real family is my coven and friends here in Minnesota. It was very difficult.

Then, when I came back, there were all the things I had to leave hanging, at home and at work. Martin did what he could, but we had no time to plan, only a couple of hours for me to pack, and try to think of things that couldn't wait, like bills that HAD to be paid.

I am finally getting my equilibrium back, and I'm looking forward to Wiscon. I am mourning in my own way, which is mostly trying to get on with my life.

Thanks for listening